Conversations With My 13 Year-Old Self

I love Pink, the artist, I like the color too, but currently I'm talking about the artist. Anyway, the other day I was in the car listening to one of her songs. It talks about her having conversations with herself at 13. Interesting to think of what we would go back and tell our younger selves if we could.  Maybe not myself at 13, but maybe at 16; things that I now try to voice to my girls at times.

1. Don't be in a hurry to grow-up and have all those grown-up responsibilities. Enjoy being young and the responsibilities that you have as a kid. All the grown-up stuff will come, the good and the bad, the mortgage, jobs, family, life decisions, etc. You will experience all of it in due time, for now enjoy being a kid.

2. Don't worry so much about pleasing everyone else. Look inside your heart, what makes you happy? Who do you want to be? Do those things, be that person. When you are true to yourself everything else will fall into place, you don't always need to put everyone else first. Sometimes it's ok to put yourself first.

3. Try not to hold on to resentment and anger. We can't control what others do, but we can control how we process our feelings about things that have happened. It's important to process them and move on. Holding onto the anger won't change anything and chances are they have no idea of the consequences of their actions and the impact they had on you.

4. Just because people have things doesn't mean they have stability. Make responsible choices, and not choices based on keeping up with others. Think long-term but create a balance to let you enjoy life as you go too.

5. If you want to learn how to do something, or do something you love even better, learn how to do it. Don't make excuses or list all the reasons you can't. These are things that push you, let yourself be pushed, don't let the "uncomfortable" feeling or fear of failing hold you back. If you do that you will miss out!

6. Recognize those that stand by you. Those who have never left you. Those who have always CHOSEN you. Cherish them, appreciate them and try not to lash out at them. They aren't the ones whose choices have hurt you, they aren't the ones who deserve your anger.

7. Your instincts are usually correct. If the thought of a possible situation or activity makes you uncomfortable it's probably because it's a bad idea. Listen to your gut, you'll have less "I wish I wouldn't have done that." moments.

8. Try to keep it positive. Try to keep that optimism. Yes, the world will suck at times and yes there will be days when you feel like crawling into a cave. Don't! Take on the world and remember that "This too shall pass."

9. Guess what? Not everyone like you and you won't like everyone. Sometimes people won't like you for reasons that you don't know or don't make sense. Regardless, always be respectful of others, even if they aren't being that way to you.

10. Have confidence in yourself! It's amazing what you can do when you want to. You are smart and you can do whatever you put your mind to! Always believe in yourself, while you will have others who believe in you too, you must always know that you are capable of anything!

I suppose if we could go back and say these things to ourselves we may miss out on some lessons and learning some things that we need to through our own experiences. I still try to shine these perspectives into my girls. They might not all sink in, as some of the above are ones that I still struggle with, but for those that do will hopefully aide them in a better outlook at times and make life a little easier.